Say It Like You Mean It
by sayb'tch01
Summary: Casey kept something from Sammy and now it out.Is she going to be able to trust and be able to love him again, as she takes a step away from what she know she realize,change is hard but can sometimes be for the better.Will get better.Cammy at the end R
1. Chapter 1

"Hey Sammy I was..." Cricket starts I cut her off.

"No I don't want to go camping." Of course she couldn't expect me not to forget what happened last time. Crazy poachers for one thing but Casey did hold my hands...

"I was going to ask if you were going to the Tom brothers bonfire thing." She starts bouncing excitedly.

"Um last year half the people were arrested for underage drinking." I knew there was no way I could talk my way out of this but a girl gots to give it a try.

"We won't touch any beer or anything illegal for that matter. My brother can be our bodyguard. We will get to meet new people and have fun. There is a skate park hella close." She starts talking at 60 miles per hour. And the word skate park stands out. Casey got me an new board that I need to break in so I might as well go. And stick so skateboarding only.

"Fine, Marissa set you over?" I ask nodding at her unsneakily trying to hide behind a park bench.

"Yeah but we haven't hung out much and I thought this would be a good opportunity." She throws her arms around me and hugs me tight.

"So will pick you up at 7 tonight okay." She gives me a grin and hurries over to Marissa.

"Wait I thought it was on Saturday." I call out walking towards them. They start walking away.

"Yeah but they moved it up because it's suppose to rain on Saturday she calls back." They speed up. And then I see Danny crossing the courtyard. _Ugg he makes me wanna through up. What does Marissa see in him?_

"When did Cricket and Marissa become such go friends?" Someone huskily whispers into my ears. He wraps his hands around my waist and spins me around.

"Stop it Casey I am going to be sick." I yell He puts me down and turns me around so I am facing him. Our faces are so close together that our nose are almost touching.

"Hey." I say staring into his deep rich brown eyes.

"I missed you."

"You just saw me half an hour ago at lunch." I giggle hitting lightly on the arm.

"There's something I need to tell you." He's face gets serious and I take a step back surprised at the transformation. _What could he need to tell me? Our relationship has been going smoothly, we barely fight..._

"Why don't we sit down." My voice sounds hollow and cold even to my own ears. We sit on one of the benches.

"I want to you to know that this isn't you fault-" the bell cuts him off and we look at each other awkwardly. _Saved by the bell is probably what his thinking. _

"I have to go." I say mad that my voice sounds raw and rusty. He doesn't try to stop me as I stand up and walk away.

_There is now way I am going to be able to ace that Spanish test. _I wrap my arms around myself and walk to my car.

* * *

"Where are you?" Marissa yells into the phone I wince and look at the clock. "The neighbors probably think we are going to break in or something."

"I am not going anymore."

"What? Holly can talk to Sammy while I find somewhere to park." There is lots of yelping and muffled sounds as I her the phone being passed around.

"Sammy we are outside where are you?"

"I can't go anymore."

"What why?"

"I think Casey broke up with me."

"Are you sure, what do you mean you think?"

"He started telling me it's not my fault and stuff-"

"And then?"

"Then the freakin bell rang." I mutter bitterly. There is a pause on the other side of the line, then Holly bursts out laughing. I burst into tears.

"Sammy listen that's the same Billy started his I am not ready to have sex yet conversation, so chill okay."

I stop crying and feel 100x better. Of course that's what he wanted to say. Our last make out session went pretty far. I might as well go. I throw back the covers to Hudson's guest bed and shove my shoes back on.

"Thanks Hudson." I yell as I run down the stairs. He sticks his head out of his room and nods. He is a really good listener and always has time and a place for me.

"Be safe."

"Sammy where are you?" My phone asks me. I almost drop it but then remember I never hung up on Holly.

"I am coming." I hop of my favorite porch in the whole world and head toward the Jeep that's idle in the middle of the street. "What happened to parking?"

"Just get in." Marissa laughs from the driver's seat. I manage to squeeze into the backseat which I am pretty sure is only for three people. But then I was sitting on Holly's lap so it was technically only holding five people." I hope we don't get pulled over."

"Hey Sammy it's a good thing you don't wear make-up, you don't even look like you were crying." Holly comments.

"Thanks."

It takes us five minutes to get to a beach that is 15 minutes away. Yep Marissa was hitting 60 in 25 mile zones. She's a crazy driver and I wonder why she has no tickets yet. The moment we open the door we are greeted with music and laughter.

"You guys made it." Danny says, coming out of nowhere. I ignore him and make my way over to the buffet. Fried chicken here I come. I grab a plate and turn to ask where the forks were when I see them. My jaw falls open.

It's Casey. Holding some other girl's hand. He says something and she laughs. Holly was wrong so wrong. Was this what he wanted to tell me, to talk to me about. _I am sorry Sammy but I have a new girlfriend. _

His eyes meet mine and he drops her hand like it's hot potato. He whispers something to her and she nods and looks in my direction. But I can tell she has no idea what she's looking for. He walks over to me.

"I was going to tell you earlier, I didn't want to hurt you."

"Really Casey because if that's true you wouldn't be over there with her. You wouldn't have cheated and you lied to me. You pretended everything was normal." My voice rises a key higher.

He cuts in. I stop and look at him. "She's pregnant."


	2. Chapter 2

The last word drop a 30 ton rock on my heart. " How long?"

"17 weeks, I have known for a week." He says quietly not looking me in the eye.

"Every kiss you kissed me, every time you told me I looked pretty, every time you told me I was the most important thing to you, every time you hugged me or held my hand or laughed at one of my jokes you lied to me. You Casey are a LIAR!"I scream at him. I pick up on of the cups of punch and want to throw it at him so bad but I take a sip and turn from him. "Don't ever bring that slut around here again. Or I am going to make sure someone has to pay?"

"I will not cry, I am over him." I whisper to myself as I walk away. I feel the eyes of the by standers on my back. And i can't say I knew it but Casey just watched me go. He didn't try to stop me or anything. Again.

"Marissa come on answer your phone." I say over and over again. I pump my fist into the air when she picks up. "Can you give me your keys ? I need to leave."

"I heard what happened I am coming over, I am walking from the canoe dock so I'll be there is 5."

"Thanks." I rest my head on the hood of the car. The metal was warm and I stood up again.

"Hey Sammy." The voice belongs to the one and only Danny. I give him a weak nod. He steps closer to me and then pause before giving me a hug. Normal I would have pushed him away and cussed him out but right now... it felt nice someone hugging me.

"I am sorry." I start to sob gently into his shirt. Who knew Danny wasn't just a pretty face? Marissa. Marissa who had the crush on him. I pushed him away.

"Sammy you can't see it can you?" He chuckles. He sways slightly and I know he has had way too much to drink.

"See what?" I ask looking around. He smile a little.

"I'll show you." With those word he press his lips against mine they taste like mint and cheap beer.

"What the fuck!" I pull back surprised. Danny takes a step back.

"Um I think I'll leave." His eyes are looking at something over my head, I turn around to see Marissa. Black tears are running down her face. Silent tears are running down her face.

"Don't ever talk to me." She sobs as she turns around and runs away from me. Or Danny.

"How could you?" I explode I hit him square in the face. He looks surprise for a second before crumpling into a unconscious pile. I stare at him for a second then burst out crying.

Not only had I just lost my boyfriend, I now didn't have a bestfriend. No one to lean on or to ask for help. No one to make me laugh when I am down. No one who knew all my secrets.

Four months ago was our two year anniversary.

* * *

It's probably two in the morning but I am still going strong. I ride down a handrail and almost make it before I fall. I stick my hands out to stop my fall but my head still knocks the ground. My hands sting and my head is throbbing. I look at my hands and see them gleam. I must have scraped them really bad because now they were bleeding. I realize how tired I am and how weak I feel. For a numbing five hours I just rode my board to and fro. I feel the cold seep from the cement into me. I let the heaviness, the blackness take over.


	3. Chapter 3

"Saammy wake up and drink this." I hear Hudson's voice calling. I feel someone nugde me gently but I just pull my covers over my head and refuse to come out. I wrap myself up burrito style and lay silently. I hear him place down the tray gently and walk away silently, not asking why I am not getting out of bed. I feel my arm arm, it's bandaged neatly and feels a little numb. When did Hudson come get me? I sigh knowing that sooner or later I must get out of bed and face the world. I throw back the covers and sit up.

"You can do this Sammy." I say out loud.

* * *

"How did you know where to find me?" I quietly ask Hudson before taking a small sip of British Tea.

"A friend is someone who knows the song in your heart and can sing it back to you when you have forgotten the words." He replies a small smile dancing on his lips." Your Grams was very worried about you."

"I know." I say gulping down some more tea. It was hot but I really didn't want to talk about worrying Grams. The guilt was already starting to eat me up. "But I don't want her to worry and when I don't tell her things she worries and when I do tell her she also worries."

"Sammy I can only ell you this, your grandmother is and amazing person who has been through so much. Trust her."

"I don't know who I can trust anymore..." I blurt out. I try to push back the tears as the story all comes pouring out. Hudson quietly listens and nods in all the right places. When I finish he doesn't say anything and we just sit there in silence.

"Casey would never want to hurt you, just listen to his side."

"What side, there is only one way to get a girl pregnant." I say bitterly. The tears reform in my eyes and I am suddenly boo hooing all over Hudson's porch.

He hugs me close to him and mumbles a few comforting words. Okay not so comforting something about how love can with stand all things. Why can't he say something about how revenge is worth it or what a bad influence Casey was. I sniffle and wipe my nose.

"I hate him." I say picking at the loose thread of my sweater.

"Don't be quick to say that, this is when he really needs you."

"Why is it so hard?" I stand up and take my breakfast dishes inside.

* * *

"Class today we have a new student Sandra Brown, is joining us from LA." I stared at my Spanish notebook trying to remember the what congregation went where. The words all looked the same.

"Samantha!" Mr. Pratt called. I jerked up in my seat and covered my journal in with my arm. After all this was biology. "Can you show Sandra around, you guys have a lot of the same classes.

"Sure." I sit up and smile turning finally looking at the girl. My smile is frozen on my face. I know her. My face muscles start to hurt. Last time I saw her she was with... Casey. I could barely see the baby bump.

"Um hi." She says pulling out the chair next to me. She doesn't remember me, a list of things I could do to her runs through my head. Thank goodness I have lunch next I need some breathing time before I claw her eyes out.

"Do I know you from somewhere?" She studies my face.

"Does it look like I know you?" I say sweetly but even I can hear the bitchy tone underneath. "Sorry bad day."

"It's okay, I had like the worst weekend. So I know where you are at." She sighs and digs into her tote bag. She replies her lip balm and I consciously lick my lips. "Do you by...?

The bell cuts her off. I stand up and shove my things in my bag. I sigh knowing that today Marissa would ignore me again but I really had to try to get her to listen to me. I stop by my locker and Sandra runs into me and I forgot about her. How could I forget about her? It's because of her that everything is failing apart in my life. But she is at my mercy. I could destroy her. I could create her. I am Sammy and I don't play the jealousy game.

"I don't really have any friends so I was wondering..." I spot Casey making beeline toward me. Or Sandra. I feel my mouth go dry and my palms become moist.


End file.
